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So it’s that time of year again where many people make and a lot of people break new year resolutions.  So, what’s going on here?  Rather than beating ourselves up for not being able to stick to our intentions can we examine things from another angle?  I believe we can.

If we want to make some changes in our lives, how about we set some compelling goals?  Something which makes us feel excited, makes us tingle or really inspires us in some way?  Something which when we have achieved it will make us say YES that was absolutely worth the time, energy and dedication!  With these kind of mouth watering goals which make your heart sing then, I believe we are much more likely to follow through with our actions if and when the going gets tough.  We can ask ourselves the question, what do we really want and what difference will having this make in my life, rather than a list of shoulds.

So what does this have to do with speaking in front of others?  Many many people give themselves an extremely hard time when they are doing this.  There may be a list of shoulds, or should nots such as I shouldn’t make a mistake, I should sound more confident or I shouldn’t have worn those shoes … We can help ourselves by being kind to ourselves and treating ourselves as if we were our own best friend.  This may be challenging to begin with, but it is possible.  We can ask ourselves what do we need to support ourselves – do we need to practice in front of a friend or colleague, do we need to learn to switch off our inner critic or something else? And not only that, we can explore the bigger picture.  If you imagine how things will feel, sound or look different when you are feeling more confident at speaking in public then what can you get excited about?  What becomes possible now?